Not so long ago, single parents stood no chance whatsoever of adopting a child. Fortunately, society has realized that a child with only one parent is better off than a child with no parent growing up in a foster home. It is easier to adopt a child as a single parent today and it was 20 years ago.
The statistics show that single parents are now adopting around twenty-five percent of children with special needs and about five per cent of all other adoptions. Children with special needs are considered harder to place with a foster family and a significant number of these children are being adopted by people wanting to start their own single parent families.
Although mental health experts think that the ideal is to place a child in a home where there is both a mother and father, this is not always possible. Even though single parent adopting has been largely accepted as a good practice, there are still many detractors and many agencies will not even entertain the idea of a single parent adoption.
Single men find it even more difficult to adopt a child, but there are those who do manage through perseverance, and the national support organization, the Committee for Single Adoptive Parents, says that 10% of parents who adopt are single men. This change in roles, as such, has come about over the years by women becoming more career-oriented, thereby expecting the man to do more around the house and also to become more involved in child-rearing.
Things to consider
- Decide whether you want to adopt a child from your own country or whether you would like to go ahead with an international adoption, also known as an inter country or transnational adoption. If you decide to go ahead with an international adoption you will also have to decide on which country you would like to adopt from. Countries such as China or South Korea are open to international adoptions and while the process is arduous and expensive, countries in Africa are more complicated to adopt from
- Decide which age child you would like to adopt; there is a big difference in adopting a toddler and a teenager, for instance.
- Think very long and hard about whether you would be willing to adopt a special-needs child, and be honest with yourself as to whether you would be able to give that child all the attention and love he/she deserves.
- Make contact with a Social Service Agency and research what is required and find out about specific adoption programs that may exist in your state.
- Find an adoption agency within the state in which you live; this agency would have to do a Home Study to make sure that your home is child-friendly. They will also help with the adoption process and usually with after-placement services too.
- Be very careful to research the agency which you would like to use to make sure that they are legitimate and not trying to swindle you out of your money.
Single parents almost all say that the best resource that you can have when trying to adopt as a single parent is a Parent Support Group who could help you with all the ins and outs that adopting as a single parent entails. The members of such a group can also supply you with a lot of good advice from their own firsthand experience. Most importantly, you must realize that adoptions, especially inter country adoptions, can be a lengthy process and you should not get discouraged if it takes a year to process.
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