The Gow family
Filmmakers' Journal
Follow our progress and share our experiences as we examine a real American revolution in our midst ...
April 4, 2006
Entry by
Eric Stange, senior producer
Sometimes, it's just in the air.
That's the way it feels with adoption right now. In the past few weeks I can't pick up a newspaper without reading about adoption.
The Southworth kids
But for every story that hits the papers, there are a hundred more just as compelling that aren't publicized. Those are the stories we're looking for. The "Faces of Adoption" section of this Web site has received dozens of wonderful, candid and moving accounts. And we're hoping to hear more.
We know that our film's success depends not just on the financial generosity of the adoption community, but also on the willingness of ordinary people to share their intimate stories.
Just two examples:
I received an E-mail in early January from a woman who has married into a remarkable family, and after the holidays, she clearly felt the need to let us know about it. "Marilyn and Val Gow are awe-inspiring parents," she writes about her parents-in-law. "After raising an entire family, they have adopted a total of seven children who range in age from eight to sixteen."
The Gows live in Duluth, Minnesota with their new sons, all of whom suffer from fetal alcohol syndrome. When their five biological children were mostly grown, and the house was starting to feel empty, Marilyn and Val began to search Web sites that help find families for older kids who need them.
"We knew younger kids would have an easier time being adopted. We wanted to take children who might not find a home otherwise," says Marilyn.
Why do they do it? Simple. "Every child deserves a family."
Through a neighbor, I've met another remarkable family. Linda and Rob Fischl Southworth decided to adopt from Russia. And they felt strongly they wanted siblings, ideally a girl and a boy. As it turned out, the agency they worked with located two sisters. So, about three years ago, Rob and Linda came home to New York City with Katya, four, and Natalya, two, and settled into the challenges of instant parenthood.
Then, everything changed. Linda had become good friends with the coordinator of the Russian agency. Through her, the couple learned out of the blue that their daughters' birthmother had died. And that she had left behind an eight-month-old boy—their daughters' brother.
Another kid wasn't in the plan, says Linda. But the answer became clear almost immediately. "Once I'd heard about him, I woke up in the middle of the night in tears," she recalls. "We decided in a week; there was just no other way."
Now, three siblings whose chances of staying together in Russia were slim at best are growing up together in New York City. And Linda and Rob can't imagine it being any other way. "We have an unusual story," says Linda. "Sometimes, people want to put us on a pedestal... but all we wanted was to create a family."
Please tell us about your experiences. Joyful, inspiring, moving, sad ... we want to tell the whole story of adoption, and we can only do that with your help.
Eric Stange is a documentary filmmaker who has often collaborated with WGBH Boston. His work has been broadcast on PBS, The Discovery Channel and the BBC. Eric is the Executive Producer and Director of Spy Pond Productions.
Previous Journals:
December 7, 2005
October 25, 2005
September 26, 2005
August 18, 2005
July 22, 2005